Meet the Summer TV Special "Team"
Jim "Live from the Palladium" Douglas
A strange anomaly of a person, Jim is both achingly unfunny, and yet strangely compelling. What will his Editing hi-jinks lead to this month? Maybe an excellent joke about a red indian ordering a drink or perhaps a swinging dance routine with the internationally revered Jim Douglas Connection. Either way, you'd be mad to miss him. So tune in, drop out, nod off.
Alison "Play Your Cards Right" Skeat
A dolly dealer if ever we saw one! Now, if Alison plays her cards right this month she could go through to the exciting final where she'll be given the chance to win amazing prizes like ... these!
Tim "3-2-1" Noonan
A Trip to the Typesetters/An Afternoon Ordering Couriers/A Deadline Advancement or tonight's star prize ... Extra Mono Pages in the Inner Section!
Be sure to tune in and see all these prizes and more flash before Alison's eyes in our special section, Nightmare of the Month!
A confusing hour's viewing at the best of times, Showmaster Tim has the entire office bemused and astounded with his complex clues and double-twists. "I'll be in at about 10 o'clock" for example, obviously indicates to the uneducated viewer that Tim will be in at around 10 in the morning. Wrong! Dusty Bin for you! It actually means "I'm going back to bed and I'll see what the weather's like when I get up." See if you can tell what Tim's talking about.
How The Hell
I've Got This Problem
Katherine "Hello, I must be going" Lee
Martha "A higgedly hoggedly" Moloughney
Dean "Leg-biscuits" Barrett
Sarah "Wall-planner" Ewing
Terry "Strike-beater" Pratt
Clive "Knuckle Sandwich" Pembridge
This month's cover: Dynamite Dux from Activision
Cover Artist: Jerry Paris
|GEMINI WING||Sales Curve|
|INDIANA JONES & THE LAST CRUSADE||US Gold|
|LICENCE TO KILL||Domark|
|NEW ZEALAND STORY||Ocean|
|THE MUTIES STOLE MY TRUCK||Players Premier|
Dynamite Dux comes from the rather clever people at Activision, and since one of their latest releases was the none-too-unpopular R-Type we predicted that it was going to be probably the best game released this month. Were we right? Yes, actually, we were. And we've lavished an extraordinary three blummin' pages on the thing in order to let you in on the extra superness of it all.
Good evening. And in a packed programme tonight, previews will be asking such questions on the nation's lips: "What on earth has Super Wonderboy got on his head?", "What the dickens are US Gold going to do with a game title called Skweek?", "How is Cabal coming along?" All these and more will be answered, on this show, tonight!
Dirty Tricks Dept
How many colour pages? FIVE. Yus. Not four or seven or three or none, but FIVE COLOUR SEXIES, sorry PAGES choc full of well, DIRTY TRICKS. They're DIRTY. They're TRICKS. And it's a DEPARTMENT! Lawks!
Indiana Jones! Da da da daaah, duh duh duuuuhh. He's back. And this time, he bought some wrinkly old Scottish geezer with him! Check out Indy and his dad Gareth and then put them on your wall, why dontcha?
Strider. One of USG's biggies and this month we can give you a complete machine code printout of all the protection routines and the graphics generator used by the programmers. Well, alright, we can't. What we can give you, though, is a more thorough investigation of how the game was put together thanks to the rather helpful programmy people. Far more interesting than a page full of numbers.
SAM Coupe Special
The SAM Coupe could well take the Spectrum world by storm when it come out next year. What, exactly, does it have to offer? Why don't you have a look?
Alright alright alright! We're sick and tired of everyone asking us "'Ere. This satellite business. It's all to do with Amstrad isn't it? Well, I was wondering, since you're very good mates with Alan Sugar, could you tell me exactly what frequency modulator I need to install in order to pick up the signals and what's the difference between SKY and BSB and who is Rupert Murdoch and how many giggerhertz ..." So these people can ruddy well go away. Instead, we've got a far more interesting selection of facts and figures in our SATELLITE TV SPECIAL. Oh, and we're giving away a dish too.
Win Win Win! Be David Bailey!
"Yes. Ooh, lovely. Now look this way love, now just a little water. Divine! Now love the camera, sweetheart, that's right! Makeup! - She's got a shiny nose. Come on. Time is money ..." You too can get up people's noses if you win our Canon Sureshot thanks to Virginmastertroniclimitedplc.
Win A Satellite Dish
Once you've read the lovely feature, you'll probably be only too keen to buy yourself a dish and all the business. Luckily, we've saved you the expense, and one lovely winner will walk away with (well, we'll deliver it actually) the whole blooming lot.
Win the coin-op!
Tell It To Wayne
I've Got This Problem
How the Hell
Nene River Press
© Copyright 1989
ISSN No. 0262-5458
All information is correct at the time of going to press. While we apologise for any typographical errors or inaccuracies, we're only flaming human, so don't get pedantic, OK?
No part of this magazine may be reproduced or transcribed, in whole or in part, by any means, conventional, electronic, or downright bizarre without written consent of the publishers, EMAP Business and Computer Publications. So Neeeeeeeerrrrr!